16 July 2009

I hate summer!

So, this has been my summer so far, with my Depression rearing its ugly head full-on:

During the past two weeks, I've become completely discombobulated as I had no power for around three days due to a supercell thunderstorm that hit the immediate area I live in, and then it took another 3-4 days for the Internet/cable/phone to come back up. I took some pictures, and a video during the storm itself (although it's hard to see much in the video as it was taken at night in pitch-black conditions).

A day after I got the Internet back, the f'n cord from the AC adaptor to my laptop (computer) severed to the point where the wires were no longer making contact. I was just able to log into eBay and order a replacement (for $11--thankfully) before the battery died on me, and I just received that yesterday.

So now I'm playing catch-up to nearly two weeks of being disconnected from the grid. I feel so lost. Not to mention, over 18,000 unread e-mails (not spam, actual e-mails that I have to at least glance through).

Seven years ago today, Elizabeth Zoel Frank, my grandmother who raised me, moved on to another realm. I miss her something fierce and wish she were still here with me.

Two weeks and one year ago, my grandfather joined my grandmother in her journeys in the universe. A few weeks before that, the last person I had truly strong feelings for -- the last person I had fallen in love with -- died (and I've just found out that it was perhaps by his own hand), also seven years ago.

Speaking of death, within the past few weeks, we've lost Ed McMahon, Farrah Fawcett, Mollie Sugden, and Michael Jackson among some of the more famous individuals who have graced us with their presence in this existence.

In approximately 10 days, my niece is going to have approximately 60% of her brain removed. That 60% is the portion of her brain that died when she had a stroke on the second day of her life. It is hoped that removing this dead matter in her brain will cut down on her seizures.

One of my best friend's mother landed herself in hospital at the beginning of this week. Today, she was transferred to a hospital in the Bronx for testing. My friend is just about beside himself.

I have a roommate who refuses to purchase anything for the household (cleaning supplies, paper/toiletries, light bulbs, etc.) or do any cleaning.

I leave the air-conditioning of my bedroom and feel like someone is squeezing the air out of my lungs from oppressive the humidity/heat, as well as all of the loverly pollutants in this fine Yonkers, New York air.

I wake up with more and more mosquito bites.

I'm growing out of my clothes and can't exercise (at least to the extent required so that I would be able to lose, or at least stop gaining, weight) due to the limited mobility of my lower extremities (which is due to injuries I sustained in my motor vehicle accident seven years ago).

The only people I have any interest in, romantically speaking, are either taken or not interested in me.

And it's any wonder I want to just hide away in my bed until the summer is over?

1 comment:

  1. Well hiding won't make it better.

    You know, I've lost over 30 lbs. and haven't done a lick of exercise.

    Maybe just watching what you eat will help?

    I'm so sorry for all of your losses in your family. It's so difficult to deal with.

    I am ESPECIALLY hopeful that everything turns out OK for your niece. I can't even believe they CAN take out 60% of someone's brain.

    Unreal.

    All the best.

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